The US gun law sucks – fact. Putting more guns in more places will not solve gun crime. Putting guns in schools is just fucking ridiculous.
Anyhoo, it occurred to me that this ‘god given’ right to bear arms in the Second Amendment to the United States Constitution and part of the Bill of Rights has been sorely misinterpreted. It was all about fancy dress and having fun, not possessing firearms. Barrack Obama kindly demonstrates my point…
The Right to Bear Arms - it's meant to be about fancy dress, not firearms!
If someone can pass on the message to the US Government, pointing out the fundamental flaw in their interpretation of the Second Amendment that would be great. The picture should help.
At the request of some fellers who are eagerly awaiting Steak and Blow Job Day on March 14th, I have created a rather lovely design that can be given to a lucky lady in return for a steak and a blow job.
By all accounts Steak and Blow Job day is meant to be some sort of cum-uppance for Valentine’s Day, but also works quite well in the ladies favour I believe – Man does a great job of being lovely on Feb 14th, and a month later, depending on the effort levels of said man on day of forced love, lovely lady returns appropriate affection accordingly.
In laymans terms, if man produced flowers, choccies and fabulous foods with a bit of Barry White blaring out in the background to honour St Val, on Steak and Blow Job Day lovely lady will be prepared to get in the kitchen, cook up a nice bit of meat and then be ready to take a different type of meaty morsel in her own mouth to consummate the special occasion.
For ladies who don’t like to munch on a love truncheon, it is highly recommended that all requests for affection on Valentines Day are withdrawn from hereon in!
Steak and Blow Job Day is a perfect antidote to clinton-card-esque romance, and maybe quite fitting given the strange way we honor the martyrdom and torture of St Valentine himself.
One thing that may have been missed out however (which was pointed out by my obviously expectant other half) is that it should be Beer Steak and Blow Job Day.
That is why I would like your help.
I have been trying to work out which modesty ‘star’ works best with the porn cards… let me know which version you think is best in the comments below and the winner will get a card once printed! Woo!
- Something Themed
- CCTV Pixels
- Or maybe just a blain old black strip?
modesty tree (something relevant to the occasion)
Holly – forgot to tell you that your Fanny Drawing is actually in the post and on its way!
GOT A BETTER IDEA FOR ADDING SOME MODESTY TO A PORN CARD? GET IN TOUCH!
Thanks to the lovely Smutmeister at Smutty Cards you can now buy four different ChewingLard cards online… wooo! These are perfect for any time of year when you want to tell that special someone just how you feel about them, but they are particularly perfect for Valentines Day.
CLICK ON A CARD TO GO STRAIGHT TO THE STORE
oooh, the cards have landed!
Been playing around with some ideas today and the result was quite a pleasing faceless nude on a ceramic tile…
…and an espresso cup and saucer decorated with vaginas.
I will definitely be playing around with that idea some more in the future. I think these would be great as part of the Fine Art Fannies Homewares Range.
If you are, then I hope you like my Valentines Day Card design. Love is great isn’t it!
There’s more where that came from too – keep posted as Feb 14th approaches!
Just wishing you all a very merry fucking Christmas…
The first of some brilliant Christmas specials coming up – Is it just me or does that look like Yvette Fielding on the left?
I just made my first vagina necklace. What do you think?
I have been busy crafting some spectacular things, so now you can order more than just felt fanny cushions and brooches either here at the SHOP!, at Fine Art Fannies or at Tea and Sympathy in Colchester (you will have to ask because my stuff is hidden away)
Check out this lovely lot!